Servicios / Tualet

With alien hordes roaming the streets, desperate for a leak, Cazorla Council cracked open the piggy bank and commissioned this marvellous sign: But is the target audience English- or French-speaking? And, since the verbal and iconic messages aren’t coordinated (users don’t immediately associate the arrow and icon on the left with the words on the…

Pig foot gypsy charm

A Roger Ekirch, At day’s close: night in times past: “suspending the heart of a bullock or pig over the hearth, preferably stuck with pins and thorns”. Barcelona’s inquisition records and other (later) sources also contain a desperate screech of (sometimes living) cats and a wide range of barnyard animals with pins stuck into them…
Where to, little wombat?

We keep our fine wines in old boots

Avert your eyes, epilepsy sufferers, as the Flash animations load, but stay on for the fucked goodies on the Bohórquez family estates, “where the brave bull wanders”, “the horse gallops to his whim”, and everybody else simply skips to their Lou as the sun withdraws discretely behind the “intricate skirted passages of ever bloomed plant…

“the Virgen Moroneta”

A moreneta is a little black woman. English speakers might assume that the moroneta Julià Travel is going to take you to visit is a stupid little woman, but Base de bandades says she is the patron saint of all Catalonia’s Moroccans. (There’s no direct attribution to Julià Travel on the site, but the texts…

“one of the most rooted wine families in Jerez”

The Ayuntamiento de Jerez gets EU money to assist with tourist promotion, but professional translators won’t work with it because it never pays on time. So instead of employing someone who can speak English and knows how to use a spellcheck, translation jobs seem to go to some witless illiterate at town hall who may,…

“Language Policy at Catalonia”

A delightful mistranslation on the Generalitat’s translation page (you’ll probably need to click through to the English version if your language default is Spanish or Catalan). (Thanks JD)

Wesley Willis

Has got to be in there somewhere: Lyrics: Suck a polar bear’s funky ass! Suck a racehorse’s cock with Heinz Tomato Ketchup! Suck a donkey’s shitty ass! Suck a male camel’s dick with Hoisin sauce! Suck a cheetah’s dick Suck a cheetah’s dick Suck a cheetah’s dick Suck a cheetah’s dick Suck a European bison’s…

Generic description of pipes

The tubular and conical wooden pipes are made on a lathe and tuned with stopped plugs. Larger (lath) pipes are long rectangular tubes made by sticking four thin slats of wood together with glue and carving a whistle for the end. Wooden tubes that can be seen are layered with gold or aluminium paint before…

No dog launching in Algorfa, Alicante

The chief of police of this small tourist town has apparently published an English version of the municipal bylaws. Among other things he wants you to do is to “Alter public order and tranquillity with scandals, disturbances, brawls and noise.” Will fucked translation constitute an adequate defence for British hooligans? Is the council–whose income from…