We are too smart to buy this crap off Festina, because we happen to know that according to Maya prophecy on December 21 2012 we will be so smoothly and swimmingly plugged into the Earth’s electromagnetic battery that all our timepieces will explode and we’ll need to buy new ones. Neither the copywriter, nor the translator, nor the monkey standing in for both of them while they mainline heroin into their brains can be blamed for trying particularly hard for a product with such a short lifespan:
Lotus is ready for this moment in time and launches its commemorative collections for the coming seasons, until the arrival of 21-12-2012, which will anticipate the beginning of the change of our civilisation.
The autumn-winter 2011 collection will cover the next semester with three collections (Tornado, Doom and Glee) that are inspired by big energy events: meteorites, tornados and other natural phenomenon. With Lotus’ own style, being daring, the new models will catch the eye of young people full of energy who appreciate innovation and enjoy living the here and now, living the moment.
For Lotus clients the best is yet to come, they know that the brand will always meet their expectations. Facing the situation predicted by the Mayas, Lotus uses its attributes and is inspired by the extreme risk and action in its pure sense. The new models give adrenaline to the wrists, of those who incite the movement. For Lotus the countdown has started.
The 2012 Lotus generation is the generation that will lead the big social change, the change of conscience…. Definitely they will be the heroes of the awaking.
Whatever happened to the Maya prophecy about fat ladies coming all the way from Florida every year to crap on their tombs?
(H/t to Tom, who having recovered from a quite alarming imaginary illness is now blogging here.)
- Sepia to the iron with ali smelt
Via Carlos Ferrero Martín and @ucedaman, another great menu, featuring ears to the iron, sepia to the iron with ali smelt, almejas to the sailor, tape of lomo…
“Ali smelt” is original and perhaps a calculated insult to one or all Shias, but “a la” as “to the” has tested the imagination, though not always the …
- La K es de kazoo
Cómo fabricarte uno, cómo combinarlos con otros instrumentos, y cómo comprarte el mejor del Organillero-Cantante.
- The worst translator in the world? “Quoth she, so much I hate this nation, / I’ll damn this author in translation”
The London Magazine, 1734:
Verses occasioned by Mr. Budgel’s modest Proposal, in the Daily Post-Boy of Aug. 31. to give the Publick a new and accurate Translation of a late celebrated French Treatise, on the Causes of the Grandeur and Declension of the Romans, and which has been already translated.
Dulness, good goddess, chanc’d to
- One less river to cross
The secrets of Erith Driving Test Centre.
- Transvestite barrel organ dancers in 1930s Whitechapel and the 1860s London West End
With acrobats, clowns, and Doris and Thisbe, goddesses of wind.