Some of the sternest criticism of Kaleboel in recent years has come from those notorious guardians of social propriety, the Viennese-Albertan Dialect Society. All attempts at pacification having failed, the other day I went and had a chat with Mahatma Heidelberg, chain-smoking head of the section dedicated to giving a voice to non-pulmonic consonants.
“Mahatma,” I said, “tell me honestly what you think is wrong with the Kaleboel brand and we’ll see if we can’t fix it.”
“Eh, Gåleböl, gimma n Eitrige, eh!”
“Hey Mahatma, let’s do this in English for the old folks at home.”
“Eh, well lots of people don’t know how to pronounce it, so you need to clarify that, then throw in the odd non-pulmonic consonant to get the youth…”
And so he went on, and so this morning I am able to present to you new, pronounceable k’alebøl, starting with a lovely little voiceless velar ejective (source). Make sure you get it right.
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