Killer novel plot

And other pub news.

This man just told me the plot of his new novel. An old man has superpowers which he doesn’t know about and which are totally random. He blows his nose, Japan is obliterated, or not. Then he meets a young girl who also has random superpowers of which she is totally unaware. Her superpowers are better than his, but they make love anyway. The end is happier than the beginning. His publisher wants more money to sell the film rights.

Paul has gone back to prison. He pleaded guilty, mainly through nostalgia, and he’d been banned from Stevenage anyway. Jez suddenly has three hundred thousand pounds and bought me a pint of Pride. D looks like he has his hand down his trousers because of an uncontrollable erection, but in fact the button has bust and it’s the only way of keeping them up.

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