Hands-free stir-fry

One of the words I missed yesterday was kletskop, apparently used in Antwerp to mean “baldie”. I’ve only seen it before in the sense of “chatterbox”, but here I guess that klets is onomatopoeiac, representing the sound made by smacking a bald bonce.

A while back a clown was operating outside Zurich on Plaza de Cataluña. Walking past, I noticed immediately that he had identified me as an amiable loon. Sure enough, he danced up and planted a plunger on my head, klets! That was my cue to look embarrassed and do the whole “oh, that was funny!” routine, but instead I ran for it. Even Maurice Green isn’t going to catch me with great big floppy shoes on his feet.

When I was sure the clown had stopped following me, I walked home with the plunger on my head and began to make the evening meal. The advantage of stirring the frying pan with your head-plunger is that you can observe the bugs on the floor and terrify them with a great flapping of arms and the emission of ear-splitting eagle shrieks.

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