- Whereas half the expat Camorra is regularly to be found wolfing down tapas in Barcelona’s port,
and whereas Spain is rapidly metamorphosing into the set of Matteo Garrone’s superb gangster film,
be it resolved to drop “Spain” (“land of rabbits“, for God’s sake) in favour of “Gomorrah”, which reflects vibrant Mediterranean customs and would in addition lead to Pygmalion being dropped from the repertory. - Whereas it is generally agreed that the nation needs to be led by a man who can shoot enough food in a weekend to keep most of us going all month,
and whereas minister Bermejo, if he took slightly more care shaving, would bear a non-negligible resemblance to the late Iraqi dictator,
be it resolved that Saddam be adopted as the title of our imperial leaders, a new race of Caesars.
So Saddam and Gomorrah it is to be.
(The remnants of Luther Blissett want to trade on Saviano’s name. What a bunch of useless tossers.)
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A journalist friend – Manu Leguineche – assures me that Saddam’s shotgun was given to him by the Caudillo himself. Beat that Bermejo!
You (no slight intended on you personally) couldn’t make it up.