Choir tonight with – hopefully – a new tenor, so here’s a tenor joke never published before in English (possibly):
Plácido and Luciano are unable to avoid one another at JFK.
LP: Plácido! How are you! We haven’t met for ages!
PD: Great, Luciano, good to see you! I’ve just done a concert at la Scala. It was packed to the ceiling and my performance was absolutely fabulous. I took 35 curtain calls and a statue of the Virgin Mary to the right of the stage began to cry spontaneously! And you, Luciano, I heard you’d been having problems. How are your concerts these days?
LP: You’ve no idea, Plácido, what a success my concert was in this wonderful city. I sang as never before at the Met with seven big screens outside: arias, canzonettas, encores, and every time the people applauded more. I took 62 calls and at the end something incredible happened. Jesus stepped down from a life-size cross at the side of the stage, came towards me and embraced me, saying: How well you sing! Not like that pig from Madrid who made my mama cry!
Boom boom. For some reason, musicians here don’t seem to tell as many jokes as further north. Dunno if it would be a good idea to get them started on banjo players.
- The floor of the church, in the form of a Latin cross, is essentially Romanesque, with cruise or transept and walls closing in this style
There is a long history of the cross-fertilisation of marine and ecclesiastical architecture, from Jesus’ boat-church on the Sea of Galilee
- Small town estate agent
– No, we’ve got absolutely nothing suitable. It’s a very difficult market. Sorry I can’t help you… – I see you’re selling
- No te cases con músico
Tres versos, cuatro chistes.
- My uncle Bumba from Kalumba dances rhumba (and he’s German)
Señor Coconut was a timely reminder to those who needed one that the best performers of Latin American music have always
- The 30s’ stupidest songs
The other day I was walking across a field with a very old and pretty conservative farmer when he suddenly started