Juxtapofuckup

Disturbing evidence of a top-secret Russian plan to buy off the entire Ukrainian officer corps with tennis pro contracts in more pleasant climes.

From the Indie:

Colonel Manchur and his men had achieved widespread fame after he marched them, unarmed, up the hill to confront the Russians and their special forces this month.

He said: “We have not had any intimidation for a few days now, but we know what happened at Sevastopol. The problem is that the Russians have lost control of the Samoobrona; when you give people like these guns, there is going to be trouble. They are a problem for us now, they will be a problem for the Russians in the future.”on some of my own projects moving forward, including playing more events around the world, which I am really enjoying. I will always be in Andy’s corner and wish him nothing but great success as he too goes into a new phase of his career.”

Having not played tennis for 14 years because of back trouble following his retirement, 54-year-old Lendl [sic, surely Manchur?] has been making an increasing number of appearances on the seniors tour and at exhibition events.

He has recently conducted coaching clinics in the Canary Islands and has also opened new courts in South Carolina at his own junior tennis academy.

Each army has something it’s really good at. When the British had an army it excelled at pig-sticking; the Spanish, on the other hand, were pigs stuck; the Finns love dancing; and the Ukrainians have applied their ballistics expertise to developing the perfect lob.

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